LSITU Fall 2018 Update: End of an Era? Addressing the Drama that Happened Earlier. Also Aprilocalypse Commentary.

Thank you for reading Last Spork in the Universe. The first book will be completed when the Aprilocalypse special ends.




I am not one for lengthy explanations. But I need to address something important. And an essay seems to be the most appropriate. The Armenian Genocide special, Coming of the Aprilocalypse, is just a special episode. I attracted a lot of attention recently, both positive and negative. But it is still canon because I said so. It’s a long read so take your time. There was a lot of drama involved during production and you need some closure.


Part 1: Production Notes.


In the original version while Annie and Rodney feel bad about ruining Noah's event, Noah decided not to forgive them because he has been through cold treatment from his peers since the early 2000s. But then I decided that it revealed too much about my thoughts and emotions. I thought it was best to hide my power level. Ufuk was not around because I didn't know how to fit him into the story back then as I didn't want to risk the wrath of tumblr. Tumblr, was where I initially hosted the webcomic.
I decided to change that and raise the stakes during the confrontation. Annie and Rodney are fat pigs who only care about themselves. Annie cares about getting blog money and uses activism to manipulate sensitive, good meaning, but impressionable liberals for her own gain. Rodney just wants to get laid and take out his anger about not getting laid out on other people like christians and activists. Anybody else who stands in their way is beaten down with harsh language. FAT PIGS. You know who these types of people are; these shitbags that get their own thread on Kiwi Farms and whine on 4chan, Reddit, Tumblr, or Twitter all day and go viral. Then they boast about how extreme they are on the political alignment chart on Discord. It makes me want to kick their ass.

I’m free from Tumblr, and I am free from school. But I felt like I neglected something important. This past April, I decided that the Aprilocalypse should get a second chance. The premise is still the same! An event at Tuskus University is ruined because a riot was created in the crowds, dividing the audience and alienating many. How will the event coordinators redeem themselves in the public’s eye? I want it to reflect today’s state of politics in the age of social media and how anything can turn ugly “wicked fast.” But I needed to improve everything else first.

Also drawing some fats ugly nerds getting punched by some other loser idiot nerds is fun. I have no other reliable outlet. But still, as much as I want to make a straw man out of neckbeards and social justice warriors many years from now the archetypes would be completely outdated. People have their reasons to support or oppose an issue.

This episode is indeed a critique of the “entitled neckbeard/sjw” trope. In the narrative, Annie and Rodney’s bickering turned ugly and they realised how much of a mess they have made. People got injured, or killed, received and hurled abusive remarks, death threats, and property loss. But because they are you know, Annie and Rodney, they only cared about their fight. They realised that their education is in jeopardy once they saw the destruction of the school’s lawn and event. They would have to participate in the presentation for community service. But can they get over their viewpoints and save themselves?

Ufuk is their foil. I am considering the political climate everywhere, not just the United States and Turkey in general. The Genocide question evolved to a global scale. I need something that could last and can translate over. Because there are a lot of people who are placed in a position where they uncover secrets that governments discourage any action. Specifically the Turkish government denies the genocide. Well they burnt the documents and landmarks to our existence and drove us out of what was once Western Armenia. There are consequences. You put yourself at risk. This can become personal like what happened to Hrant and Ufuk’s relationship. Ufuk is risking his public image AND CAREER as a professional skateboarder for his manager’s sake. Ufuk owes Hrant his livelihood and his big break, so Hrant can receive a form of security from Ufuk. I cannot make Ufuk the antagonist. What the hell sort of message am I going to send if there is an element people can misinterpret?

Noah and Lucine do it for family reasons. Their Medzmama, Araxi


Part 2. Why this episode?


There is this growing sentiment that people who are unsatisfied with their country should leave, not fix what’s wrong. I am part of a different generation of intellectuals than theirs. To speak out on issues doesn't make people hate where they are from. They're just taking the steps to remedy problems they think they can solve in a group rather than run off somewhere else with their tails between their legs. I love America, and if I see shit I don't like and think it's wrong, I call it out, I don’t want to leave the country I am born in. It is freedom of speech. Some people call me out too if I get something wrong. Still falls under freedom of speech. There is nothing wrong with supporting a cause you are passionate about. That is what is on the textbooks. That’s what I wanted to say because it’s been on my mind for a while.

However that is not what happens in real life. Politics, morality, and social media pervert this sort of thinking. The rules of society constantly change. Group think is tricky to understand, sometimes there is wisdom of the crowd. Other times I think some people are whack and need to get bent.

My anger and resentment towards far left social justice warriors and the growing population of incels within extreme right wing inspired the writing and rewriting of my first special. But the aftermath of the 2016 election and the Charlottesville clashes really sealed the deal with me. I started to fucking hate these disrespectful meat sacks they call people. I cannot call them people it would disrespect people. They are filthy objects and products of outmoded ideologies I am forced to hear about them over the internet. Why are these morons hogging the limelight? I always thought that they were stealing my time! Somebody has to call out bullshit and that will be me. Why can’t we as a society promote morals and values that everybody can agree on; just because it cannot sell?

I was one of them social justice warriors before it was considered cool and tumblr-chic. OR something threatening and toxic depending on who you ask. My mother would be considered as a quasi-paranoid, right-winger who emigrated from a war-torn “terrorist country” in the 80s if she ever met one of those people. She had a hard life to say the least. Looked down by all of those stuffy college educated folks with a master’s degree in sociology. But I value my family more, so these so called intellectuals with overpriced papers can go suck eggs. They’re the ones that made growing up harder than it had to be during my childhood.

The soapbox phase started when I was at school. My experiences promoting awareness of the Armenian Genocide towards my classmates often goes unrewarded when I was a child. I am descendant of a survivor so it meant a lot. Because this was at a time when 9-11 and the War on Terror was fresh in the minds of my generation; they didn’t understand what I was talking about. All they’ve ever heard about was Iraq, Israel, and Afghanistan because of the media (the latter was not technically middle eastern). They  picture images of coffins draped in the stars and stripes with unfazed reporters commenting on how many died today accompanied with picturing crying tan people in cloth headgear, or furious in camo. And the teachers living through the cold war didn't help my image. I don’t know what the hell was on their minds, but I was a social outcast until high school. I know they hated the war, I know they hated anybody conservative, and I know they hated me because I don’t fit into their worldview. Because their parents told them to hate me.

I lived in Massachusetts, the notorious blue state. Having my mother and medzmama be foreign born from the middle east made me and my brother easy targets of indoctrination to Democrats and the occasional right wing weirdo. My brother was easy for them, him being the “normal” one since I wasn’t. My mother is tough and a natural leader despite her conservative views, she is not afraid to tell you what is on her mind even if it might hurt her children. She just can’t shut up and will not stop talking about her opinions, her time Lebanon, or her father. It’s her way or the highway. She put me put through Armenian Saturday and Sunday School. Cultural schools have this reputation of trying to get children loyal to another country and culture. I hated it because whatever I learned there was useless in the long run and I think my Armenian vocabulary drastically shrunk during my time there.

Too bad social skills, talents, and physical activities always came second to education. She would have fit in better in the South where they are conservative but I think she’s way too scared of the actual stereotypical conservatives living there. Considering her background.

My father is American, and a veteran. He dealt with the heads of the special education department that I was in. He worked a lot but he is reliable and always comes home. I am lucky I am not from a broken family. Oftentimes I was unable to see my father during the weekday because he left for work at 3 pm (until the recession hit and he switched to different workplaces and I can see him at home more often). The teaching assistants wanted me to stay after to complete some homework until 4pm. So no sports until high school. I can tell you again I was the class outcast for a while and was sent to the special education center. The retarded kids’ classes for those less politically correct. This was located away from any actual classrooms, making for a more haunted location. But I integrated well with the mainstream classes. But I grew up having no role models who inspired me. Still the label “sped kid” never got me anywhere.

One time my mother and father were at a parent teacher meeting with my 4th grade teacher and the teaching assistant. My teacher said "Well if you had ever read a book" to my mother who read books in four languages (at the same time) over in Lebanon all during the civil war. I don’t care if it was my teacher’s best interests that I learn to read more like an adult scrutinizing everything than a child who only consumes, what she did made a child into read less because my teacher wanted to make herself feel superior for a moment. If your execution of a task was a failure, then your good intentions are wrong! She knew my mother was foreign before she met her, my classmates know it, other teachers know it too. Because I use foreign terminology and mention foreign customs in class, I feel as if they deserve to know something about me. Everybody was pissed off at what my teacher said.

Some people think that just because they vote, say, or think a certain way they think they can get away with being disrespectful. ESPECIALLY if they are something or did something in the past. I’ve seen these insufferable bastards before, I am not a spring chicken. I have friends who have been through worse treatment. But all I am saying is that I am aware of what is happening in the world. As for the teacher, that dumb blonde, racist, classist, bitch has been chased back to Michigan. But I feel sorry for her future students studying under her who would have to deal with what I went through.

I had no power over congress or the president when I was growing up so no hard feelings. But I have a problem with people plastering their opinions on a child who came of age from that era of anger and frustration. What I like to call the time period between Clinton and Trump. You cannot run from what’s happening in that world, it was on TV, it was over the internet, and therefore everywhere. Also the new TSA had to pat search me in 2005 when I was going to Las Vegas. All because two members of my family are foreign. Nevermind the veteran father who served in the navy.

I went to the memorials, I went to events related to my cause, I research and present my case to classmates. I watched for new information that appears to support my case. I became one of them for a while, despite doing nothing impactful for the long run except talking to the walls. I don’t use my asperger’s or my other conditions to guilt anybody. I just know my weaknesses and people can manipulate me because of my disabilities, which I fear the most. I hid that.

I don't miss the past because all I saw was how wrong the world became. I don't miss the 1990s and I don't miss the 2000s. Sure the nostalgia gets me but the negatives come back too. I focus on what's in front of me and what I could gain for future use. It’s worse elsewhere, I know. But I have never been to places where that “elsewhere” is 100% worse. So I don’t shame others for their own battles that are not my own.
And despite that, every whiny teacher that I had complains about why children then didn't watch the news to be more "worldly" or some shit like that. It's because MAYBE the news isn't telling everything that we needed to know as it becomes very scripted and edited for political correctness. Both the initial definition of its appeal to nationalism, and to avoid offending certain populations. I felt that there were too many filters. And all the stories I wanted to see on localized television didn't appear. Now they're saying that people aren't voting much so they have to let the immigrants register to vote without becoming a citizen. Where did I get this? They gave my medzmama a form to apply for voting when she had her green card and before she became a US citizen. Having an immigrant mother who went through the process of citizenship, you have to be a citizen to vote.

But then years later everybody and their uncle has become a SJW on my feeds or alt-right and I get no room to breathe! It’s like activism becomes a hit new trend thanks to social media. 10 years ago if you were an activist you were largely ignored. Some causes get overshadowed and tarnished by lolcows and attention whores who derail events for their own ego's sake and how it alienates actual activists who feel real passion towards a cause. I didn't see this as a product of my own influence on others due to what I was feeling at the time. I was angry and lonely because I didn’t get the boatload of likes others did just for sharing an article. I just see how many activist chase or start a trend down just because it was trending on twitter. I shill for my cause because It’s my family we’re talking here, not tumblr reblogs or patreon money. I was the original activist and I should’ve gotten credit by my old friends. Who just stared blankly whenever i said something.

But whatever happened in Charlottesville is unacceptable on both sides. I stopped caring about activism long before. I am tired of seeing these wannabe Katniss Everdeens running around thinking that they'll be rewarded like martyrs after they die for whatever political faction they choose. Right or Left. Truth is, you're just another nameless soldier for a cause to most leaders. Causes get tarnished and bastardized irregardless of the sacrifices people make just like what (almost) happened in Mockingjay. And a cause that will lose because foreigners lobby for their businesses in congress against American interests and senators don’t say otherwise because they are being paid. Yet the focus is about “Drumpf and his buddies in Russia” because some salty and bitter editor from Generation X didn’t get the candidate he wanted, so he riles up everybody while his cock is sucked by some failure indie developers.

That was me. A nobody out for some group's interests who would die tomorrow and nobody would care. Even though there was no real agenda or new world order society over it. A champion of ancient, seasonal issues the broads over at NBC and FOX will never think to give airtime over. I have other people's baggage and opinions placed upon me just because I was born to "victims of everything under the sun." All I can do is be a lending ear to people who saw trauma in their lives and have my opinions dismissed because I am “too young to have an opinion.” Then why is everything political in my goddamn sight? Damn you old people and all of your mixed messages. And I do not have a care in this world about your traumas because I never lived them so fuck you and your complaints. You use them to guilt trip me into doing things for you and I hate it.

I am not going to be somebody’s savior or martyr and run for office. I missed out on a life where I don’t have to worry about the world and I had a normal upbringing with a group of friends and the occasional boyfriend. And to only care about everyday drama like what they show on television. I was made a fool by everybody I trusted and I am manipulated into being one of those “people.” For what? You get no reward for playing the “good girl” especially if you were in my position. Every day there is something out there that wants to pull me back in the world of reading tumblr rants and shitty /pol/ tier debates I’m trying to distance myself from. But because I am weird, weirdos come out of the woodwork like stand users. This made me think I was lead towards a path I hated due to the fact that was forced on me but that was all in my head.

But nobody really intended to push me to that direction. I’m just an idiot who overthinks her own life path. Quotes about justice strewn together for a modern day Don Quixote. All because the people around me never learned that venting about what you saw on the news or on c-span is socially inappropriate behavior and its effects are destructive rather than constructive. And I thought I was the one with Asperger’s Syndrome. So now I feel like ranting about it because it’s been giving me migraines. I am thankful that I’m not a school shooter nor had I become a hypnotized terrorist.

Anyways moving on to the next part. Done acting like a shrink patient rambing about the evils of society on that one. I am not afraid of sticking up for what you believe in. I needed some release for my anger and the Aprilocalypse was a solution. I’m just tired of being the odd one out for circumstances out of my control.

I make my own worlds, my own products. Nobody wants to hear my sob story anyways. I am not a cancer patient who is a veteran of a war in their eyes. So by default I am a reject and have no honor. I know I am nobody special to society and I grew up knowing that the world does not want me; I am here to fill space.


Part 3: The Bad Webcomics Wiki Melodrama


I appreciate some feedback but I feel like I was getting nothing in return. If you want to say that I suck at something then say it to my face (or just contact me) and don’t skirt around the issue by creating a separate space to bitch behind my back. Look, I am not going to bitch to Kyo or Nama because my feelings are hurt afterwards. We’re all human. I just cannot tolerate a culture where I am getting the vibe that nobody likes me and I am overstaying my welcome but nobody can say it. This isn’t a middle school. Speak up and stop being a coward.

I forgive the folks at con el bad. You're okay. I ain't complaining nor asking for the thread to be deleted. But the reputations of places like the Bad Webcomics Wiki are technically death knells for a creator's career. Even though both places are incredibly small, you're labeled as a bad artist and people are afraid to associate with you. There is no insurance if you want to do something professional with your artwork. Nobody ever won against these people. This is the internet suck it up.

That was what is on the first page google shows and lots of people are attracted to negativity. Even though it was on the threads and it’s not an actual article yet. Just the most wanted list on the forums.

I felt angry when I first saw the thread and panicked. Like "Why the hell are they targeting me? I'm not the worst comic on comic fury. I know several webcomics that deserve to be chosen here, not me. I should stop my comic, you can’t win against the critics like these. I don't get new subscribers anyways." I saw it at night, when my restless brain is curious over how I look from an outsider presence. I wanted to stop before any con el bad article was written on me.

But I decided to get some sleep, and think about it with a clearer head in the morning. I am an adult and I am better than that. Situations like these get worse if you try to defend yourself and double down on your behavior. Webcomic people get no respect. I am not going to cry for pity and sympathy, but I am going to talk about it. Which is what I did. I am not going to list any examples of what I think are “bad webcomics.” That is unprofessional. I can handle the criticism, I'm always criticized by everybody anyways. I am critical at times too. I am not going to stoop down and make some sort of shit show over it.

I guess I needed somebody to tell me what I could do differently. I get that I needed improvement long before I saw the thread. Long before I started Last Spork in the Universe. I don't feel hurt anymore and I want to continue with what I started and end it how I intend to end. It's not the end of the world. Half of my artwork was done between 2013 to 2015 and I posted it on tumblr when I was in college. The environment of Tumblr was growing hostile and anti-art so I moved the website in 2017 for better organization and feedback. I didn't want to go to deviantart either because I will be stuck between your sonic OCs and the digital painting crowd. And the mediocre ones stand out as bad because they are mediocre. I continued on with the comic, even though I didn’t properly edit my pages until I learned how to.

The art style is inconsistent because I switched between multiple programs and I work in multiple places and multiple mediums for my series. It was a hot mess until I took drawing classes and a graphic design course to improve my skills at my community college. Got the degree this past spring. An associates is difficult to get a job with compared to a bachelor's degree, but it's better than writing in "some college" like you're a Bill Gates wannabee with debt. I plan on spending more time getting better with my art. I hand draw things, then I scan my page, and finally I edit them. First I used gimp, but I moved to photoshop before I ran out of money so I am on my own in formatting my comic. Which was why the comic's style was crappy in the beginning. I sucked then. I’m doing a little bit better now. Sometimes I do a full-color digital. But I know I have a long way to go before I am considered “the best of all time”

As for the writing, I am going to reveal the Character Motivations on Chapter 10. When I age them up because they're not aimless college students anymore. They're adults trying to get their lives together. And I want to improve and get my life together. It's been 7 years since I officially started, and 5 years for the current version. Maybe I want to go to Art school to improve my art and maybe open up paid commissions.

After I am done with Aprilocalypse, I am posting chapter 10. This is fourth time in a row I have to re-boot something because I could never get it right. I will be improving past pages on my own time.


Part 4. Why all the delays?


The second book of Last Spork in the Universe, “And We Return to This Regularly Mis-scheduled Program” will start its online syndication with chapter 10. Starting by the end of September. I expect to end the Aprilocalypse before the 11th of November. Just because November 11 was the day that the first world war ended, doesn’t mean the Armenian Genocide ended then. Yes, I will post a works cited page. Since I am shilling for a cause here. Will I be late in delivering the goods? Definitely. Will I be early? Uhhh…

That never happened because life likes to mess with my plans. Also my depression came back because the weather is getting colder. I had a job training seminar a while back.

I get delays because I take care of my medzmama whenever my parents are away and I have to call 911 to take her into the hospital if something goes wrong. I get horrible migraines that get me hospitalized. Also appointments with doctors and whatnot for other conditions. Sometimes I am working on other projects like commissions or a collaboration. Other times because I just don’t feel like it and just want to catch a break from everything.

But excuses are excuses. And I want to get the job done in the end. I know nobody honestly wants to care about my feelings. Or what I go through to get the job done.


Part 5: Why I initially wanted to quit.


Either way, No promises. No strings attached. No hard feelings. Actually scratch that last part. I am still angry. But I am not going to start a jihad or a crusade for that. I don’t think anybody respects me anywhere. Only when I die will I claim esteem because the world is filled with sons of bitches and whores. Tragic!

What a damn shame that I only get clout whenever I am involved in some drama. I call somebody out and get hunted down by angry fans. No respect.

I had a bad reputation over at Flipnote Hatena when that “GreenNinja” decided to steal my ideas and send her fans over to hurl insults and death threats at me. Fuck that place and the damn western server, I am glad that toxic wasteland shut down. With the most ANNOYING fanbases using the website it invites no good attention whores and false reporters all out for greedy purposes. Not the first time people stole from me from that website. Too bad I gave my precious time away watching these people. Nothing of value was lost. But I did make a friend there.

Glad I don’t see hide nor hair of her online. That weeaboo lost and I won. I still make stuff, good or bad. Good riddance! There is no honor among nerds and geeks, and no justice to gain from them if they do wrong. There is a reason why nobody respects these individuals and fandoms in general unless money is involved.

But ever since that incident, I just can’t bring myself to post quite as often. I don’t trust many people because I fear I will wind up in a nightmarish situation that will ruin me and so I just hide from people.


Part 6 Why I reconsidered.


I am glad I am wrong. In the end, there are people who convinced me that I should continue. I hate how our society enables people to obsess over pop culture and politics while discouraging youth to ever think about morality.

Sure some of them BWW people are nice enough to re-review my work and reconsider adding a new page. Although I repeat my statements: I don’t mind negative criticism that isn’t constructive whatsoever, but I know where I don’t want it from and I like feedback. But I don’t like how critics get to misconstruct and retell stories for their own narratives and thinking that curtains are blue because everybody in purgatory is Jesus.

No way I am going to let some raging people who post shit like “look at how much of a mindless terrorist I am on the political alignment chart please give social credit pl0x fellow forum folks” people ruin my life. You know, the stereotypical Rodney O'Toole types. I will not let people like “you have violated one of the sacred unspoken tenants of our liberal society please kill yourself” Annie Zney types ruin me. Or whoever is butthurt that I am about to destroy their viewpoints that Erdogan or Aliyev guy spews as propaganda. I am going to destroy this notion of “anything negative will sour nationalism.”

I decided to rename this “It Returned” and it will be good. The pages that make up the tenth chapter have been drafted and will be edited shortly. I guess I hit a nerve with these people on the Aprilocalypse episode.